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  • Writer's pictureDale Partridge

The last thing the world needs now...

Updated: Dec 8, 2023

Had I known when I started , I would have said “the last thing the world needs now is another ‘coach", of any kind, let alone a ‘self-coaching’ coach. I didn't know how common coaching services and promises are today. I was following my heart's desire.


Having owned or been a partner in five profitable companies, I know I can assist people just as I've done in business. I loved working with people who were putting it all on the line to build a business. Most were ‘do-it-yourself’ entrepreneurs, sometimes managers. Later I found my skills worked with friends, family and many others, volunteering to help people dealing with hopelessness and chronic pain. All of them had one thing in common. The person I was talking to was alone in being in charge of what was happening. The ultimate accountability had been accepted by them, they were the ones who could make things change.


Ironically, in business, no matter how many people reported to them, the person at the top didn’t have anyone to talk to. Nor my friend who decided it was enough and time to face it. Or the people who were persevering with such physical and mental challenges, their despair seemingly endless, their isolation an added burden, yet they were still willing to try one more time...even if it was just to talk to someone. I mean really talk, letting someone know everything that was affecting their choices that day, or that quarter or with that unexpected situation that blindsided them. And they’d talk to me. They’d tell me what was going on and what complicated things for them. Why? Because I didn’t matter in the scheme of things, AND, I was genuinely, personally interested - I really cared.


Not only did I care, I insisted on really understanding what they were saying to me, why their situation was so daunting. Doing that proved to be just what was needed for them to see their situation more completely as well. Just by asking all my questions, they too got to a place where they understood things, differently. That's when they would share what they heard or suddenly understood that was new in it all. Afterall, the ultimate solutions my clients acted on were ones they had identified. It was the client’s thinking, their natural evolved instincts, their expertise: not mine. My value to them, and to my friends, family and so many others, was being a trustworthy mirror to their experience or situation. Simply by being with them and listening and asking questions to understand. I heard them as whole people - not just bosses or owners, old friends or family, or people reeling with sickness or pain. Each was willing to share themselves, the pressures, demands, confusions and doubts affecting their choices that day. And it was that freedom to acknowledge their truth, that created their insights or the breakthrough they wanted. It was their courage, honesty and their heart-felt desires that ignited ideas that worked for them. I simply had the privilege to witness and embrace it with them, often in awe. Always in strict privacy and respect. Always in good humour and recognizing my place: I was the listener.


I'm doing that again. Apparently it's called 'coaching', yet I am not a life coach, personal coach or business coach. And giving advice, providing therapy or suggesting how something should be done is also not what I do. I advocate a simple form of self-coaching, in which anyone facing something important consults with themselves first: before anything else. It's a personal, important conversation with yourself, me asking questions so I can undertand what's going on, relying on the fact that only you have the answers. A simple conversation empowers any of us because we take charge, explain it all and often come to see the situation differently, anew. Often seeing new ways to deal with it as well. If some life situation has suddenly demanded the best of you and you need to respond, NOW, when it’s needed; take the time talk to yourself with no outside interference, expectations, pressures or demands. That’s my background and training. Working with people dealing with real time, unavoidable challenges that have to be resolved in the searing heat of reality. In my experience, it's a choice point that invites any of us to discover the best of ourselves. It's 'your heart's desire' in my view - you needing to do or be something in sync with your deepest values and aspirations - your 'life's superpower'. It's putting yourself in service to your best instincts with the choices you make when it matters. I listen, I want to understand, and I want you to make sure I understand. That's you coaching yourself to get what you want.


That’s the kind of coaching I do. I call it Go for it! Self-Coaching.


An important empowering conversation with yourself.
Communication begins with listening. Tell yourself what's important today.

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